Listening to Men Beyond Pathology.

Course Description.

The Problem: Most responses to men’s distress feign care but impose judgment: “Go get therapy,” “Fix your issues,” “Be more emotionally available.” While well-intentioned, these prescriptions often pathologize the inner lives of men by framing their thoughts and inner conflicts as defects to be fixed rather than experiences that should be meaningfully contemplated. When masculinity itself is treated as toxic and suspect, the result is further retreat and withdrawal from men rather than alignment. The Shift: This keynote proposes a radical shift: What if we simply received men? Instead of rushing to diagnose, what if we treated men as humans under pressure who are worthy of curiosity and judgment-free listening? In this way, reception does not serve as an endorsement, but moves to abstain from moral judgement long enough to understand what is actually happening beneath the veneer of masculinity that society so quickly rejects. The Framework: Drawing on criminal law concepts like mens rea (guilty mind) and duress, this lecture introduces legal humanism as a powerful alternative to paradigms that assume the need to “fix” men. Here, law offers a model of listening without pathologizing in the following modes: ◘Separating the Man from the Action: Legal reasoning separates a man from his behavior long enough to ask different questions: What conditions is he operating under? What pressures shape his choices? ◘Jurisprudential Restraint: Just as criminal law does not punish thought alone, we apply this restraint to men’s inner lives to create space for true ownership and integrity. ◘Standing as a Witness to Lived Reality: Rather than treating men as inherently defective, legal humanism treats men as witnesses in their own case, whose testimonies about their lived experiences have standing. The Impact: Audiences learn how chronic social duress around masculine provision and performance distorts relationships. By utilizing judgment-suspended listening grounded in legal concepts like actual and proximate cause, permissibility, and of course, mens rea, we create the necessary conditions for men and society to experience deeper understanding and lasting change. ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Booking & Programming: Contact mensrea@etfny.org for pricing & scheduling.